custom hardware game dev tycoon

Well now, let me tell ya ’bout this here game, “Custom Hardware Game Dev Tycoon.” It ain’t like farmin’, but it’s got its own kind of work, you see.

First off, you gotta get yourself a good place to work. Can’t be doin’ this in a shack. You need an office, a real fancy one, level 3 they say. Sounds like them city folk and their big buildin’s, but you need it for this game stuff.

Now, you can’t just hire any ol’ body. You need smart folks. First, you gotta get someone who knows design, a “design specialist,” they call ’em. Then, you need a fella who’s good with the machines, a “technology specialist.” Sounds complicated, but it just means they’re handy, I reckon.

After that, you gotta get yourself a “RD Lab.” That’s where the magic happens, they say. It’s like a workshop, but for computer stuff. In that lab, you gotta do some researchin’. You gotta research “hardware,” which is like the guts of them game machines. Think of it like buildin’ a tractor, but smaller and fancier.

But here’s the kicker, you can’t just go and hire a hardware fella. Nope. You gotta make one yourself! You take one of your regular workers, and you gotta learn ’em everything. They gotta be good at codin’, writin’, designin’, and even makin’ the sounds for the game. Each one of them things gotta be learned up to level 5, mind you. It’s like teachin’ a farmhand to plow, sow, harvest, and then fix the tractor too!

Then, once they know all that, you gotta use a special book, a “Career Change Manual,” to make ’em a hardware engineer. Sounds like a whole lotta trouble, but that’s how it is. A fella comes around sellin’ it, like a traveling salesman, you know? Always tryin’ to sell ya somethin’ you didn’t know you needed.

Once you got your smart fella and your lab, you can start buildin’ your own game machine, a “console,” they call it. But hold your horses, it ain’t cheap. It can cost a whole heap of money, like 100 million dollars! That’s more money than I ever seen in my whole life, I tell ya. And keepin’ it runnin’ costs money too, every month, from a little bit to a whole lot, dependin’ on how fancy it is.

• Get a Level 3 Office: Gotta have a good place to work.
• Train a Design Specialist: Find someone who’s good at designin’.
• Open the RD Lab: Like a workshop for computer stuff.
• Research Hardware: Learn how to make the guts of the game machines.
• Train a Tech Specialist: Get someone handy with machines.
• Train your own Hardware Engineer: Teach someone everything about makin’ games.
• Build a Hardware Lab: Another place for makin’ game machines.
• Make a Custom Console: Build your own game machine.

And don’t forget, you need a “hardware lab” too. That’s where you actually build the console. You need that tech specialist fella to get that lab goin’. After you got that all set up, go to that RD Lab, click around, and start researchin’ that hardware. Then you can choose what kinda games you wanna make. Some folks like them “RPGs” and “adventures.” I don’t know nothin’ ’bout that, but they seem to like ’em.

It’s like makin’ engines for a tractor, but you make a whole bunch of ‘em. I heard tell of someone makin’ eight of ‘em! And every time somethin’ new comes along, some new technology, they go and research it. Always gotta be learnin’ new things, I guess.

So, that’s the gist of it. It’s a lot of work, just like farmin’, but instead of crops and animals, you’re dealin’ with computers and games. You gotta be smart, gotta be patient, and you gotta have a whole lotta money. But if you do it right, you can make your own game empire, just like them city folk with their big businesses.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I gotta go tend to my chickens. This game talk is makin’ my head spin.